November 23, 2004
Sorry, I'm Late (and about half crazed)

Although I would have preferred late-and-calm. Better late than never, I suppose. Of course, my "supposings" and judgement are not to be trusted at this particular moment. I've been abandoned here at home alone with FIVE children. Hmmm. You might recall that I personally only have THREE children. AND there will be two more joining me at some point today. Yes, the one that talks like a baby-robot and his little sister (the one that only wants to eat what's on MY plate). Lalalala ... I'm in my happy place!

You might also have noticed there are two new sites listed under "Excursions" on my side-bar. TheGoodEarth and SeedlingAndSprouts. They are both FABULOUS blogs that I enjoy tremendously. I meant to add them months ago, but I don't do my own adding. Even though I sent in the request my husband-computer-guru was swamped at work and let it slip between the cracks. Then, like magic, one day they just appeared! Of course, then I was too swamped to write an entry welcoming them to the list! I've decided its better to just get a heartfelt (if slighly rambling) welcome posted instead of waiting for the time and energy to do an elegant and gracious post.

EarthGirl at TheGoodEarth is a breath of fresh air and a whiff of fresh dirt, in the very nicest kind of way. When I read her site, I get the feeling its Spring even in the darkest winter. Ya know how great dirt smells in Spring when it thaws and flowers start pushing up? Thats how her site is. Everything fresh and new and charming. It just makes you relieved to think "Oh, look, she's adding sprigs to her fresh flowers and her children are SO well-adjusted." Its very unlikely we'll ever read her post that her husband has moved to Canada to shack-up with an amatuer wanna-be porn-actress while starting an outdoor-hiking-supply-store. (That almost kinda happened to a friend of mine. I couldn't make this stuff up!)

Julie at SeedlingsAndSprouts lures you in with great writing, and pictures of manatee-prostitutes. Every time I go there I immediately smile at the picture of the rocks with the paint job. I swear that looks like a manatee-prostitute to me. I do NOT want to know what that says about my psyche. Even people with a normal mind will enjoy Julie's site. She manages to find depth and interest in all kinds of things, but she does it so subtly that you suddenly find yourself mesmerized. When you read her site, you'll find yourself thinking often "I never thought of it quite that way before". She takes the ordinary to the next level.

November 22, 2004
Moment of Truth and Revelation

I've decided that there are going to be some changes. Or, rather, some inclusions. I thought that it would improve my blog if it were only a happy place. Yet, it has become obvious to me that there are times that unhappiness has a place. Strength comes from struggle, stars shine brighter against a dark sky, etc.

Have you ever seen the movie, "The Long Kiss Goodnight"? The one with GeenaDavis? For the uninitiated, its plot is generally as follows: a homebody-mommy-schoolteacher with amnesia turns out to be an undercover killer-agent who accidentially recovers her memory in time to save the world and her daughter (or Canada, I'm a little fuzzy about that) from rogue agents and senators. In the end, she has to reconcile the two identities. She eventually ends up as an edgy-homebody-mommy-schoolteacher with significant self-defense skills and a sweet-natured husband. But during the process each identity tries to destroy the other. Day versus Night. Only at the very end does she realize that both are necessary to maintain her life.

I feel kinda like that. (No, not the part where I'm a secret-agent-killer). The part where in the distant past I had to be someone I didn't want to be in order to survive/succeed, someone cold and hard and ruthless and responsible and controlling. And then I over-relaxed or over-indulged into being the person I thought I'd like to be, someone soft and ambitionless and completely non-competitive and passive and weak/protected.

The truth of the matter is that neither of those people are me. Not really. Not totally. And I owe myself more than to be a caricature of an idea of what someone else expects me to be.

Hmmmm. You might very well ask "What brought about the big Moment of Truth and Revelation?"

November 12, 2004
Temporarily Out Of Coma

The site is temporarily out of the coma because I want to make sure that none of my readers miss the prayer request over at King-Of-Fools.

Coma resuming.

November 08, 2004

This is notice that LucysIsland will be in a coma for the next eleven days. A suspended state is necessary to get all the real stuff in my life in order. Plus, there's a ton of stuff I want to throw out before the dumpster in the drive-way leaves our lives.

Just imagine! When I return I'll be svelte and relaxed, full of giddy joy! Better than a trip to the spa. Better than chocolate! All right, not better than chocolate. Nothing is better than chocolate. Which is the very reason that I'm not currently svelte.

NeverTheLess, soon I'll return with lots of interesting and non-stressful posts.

What A Way To Wake Up!

This morning Lee crawled into bed with us for a quick snuggle before starting his day. As he wiggled down next to me, hogging my pillow and sucking all the warmth out of my down-comforter, he sighed contentedly and announced "Mama, you have such a big butt". I sleeply but firmly disagreed that my butt wasn't THAT big. He was not to be quashed. "Its HUMONGOUS!" I was a little confused at his sudden interest, until my husband composed himself enough to agree that "Yes, Lee, it IS a huge bed!"

November 06, 2004
Its 11:00 o'clock Somewhere

When we were married, my husband asked me what ideas I had for our honeymoon. I begged and pleaded and he finally agreed to just hang out at our new apartment and unpack stuff. Got to admit, he kinda shook his head in disbelief that I wanted to spend my honeymoon in Gainesville, FL.

He more than compensated by taking me to DisneyWorld for our first anniversary. It was my first trip to TheHappiestPlaceOnEarth, before my disillusionment with their freaky sneaky indoctrination of children. For the record, I now believe Disney is subtly evil. But, back then in my days of ignorance and bliss, I absolutely was enthralled! It was amazing. My husband grew up near there and knows all the tricks (like making dinner reservations at Epcot as soon as you arrive in the morning) that made the trip a blast.

We were still young and less-than-wealthy so we slept at his grandparents who lived a few minutes from Disney (and it was a chance to get to know his grandparents). The only shadow on the whole trip was that on the day of our trip home my husband wanted to get an early start and I wanted to sleep in. Very reasonably I might add, since I was exhausted from days of wringing every last bit of enjoyment out of Disneyworld.

That morning he shook me awake and urgently whispered "My grandmother is waiting breakfast on you, and its already 10:30! You've got to get up!" I jumped out of bed, made a dash through the shower, and was standing in the kitchen ten minutes later (well aware that his grandparents usually ate breakfast early early early and shuddering to think what THEY must be thinking about their slovenly new-granddaughter). I did what any good Southerner does -- I marched right into the lion's den (the kitchen), took the bull by the horns (his grandmother, although I didn't know until later that she was REALLY a sweetie) and I apologized charmingly and profusely for holding up her breakfast.

November 02, 2004
I Made A Grown Man Cry

Well, almost cry, literally. And it wasn't all my fault. I blame the lack of training Lowe's gives their employees. A few months ago I ordered new doorknobs for the house we had just bought. Shiny chrome ones. You'll note I had to order them because Lowe's only stocked brass ones. But thats a whole different issue ... back to the doorknobs.

When I ordered the knobs they messed up the order about three times. It seems that Lowe's assigns one item number to an entire style series from the manufacturer. For example, the item numbers for a left-handed lever and a twist knob are the same. Do you see how this might confuse things? Argh!!!! This is why I love HomeDepot, but for reasons too complicated to go over (again and again and again until I accept the neccessity of the situation), lets just say that I HAVE to go to Lowes.

Anyway, finally we got the correct doorknobs for the upstairs months ago. Since that time, we've found a dear sweet contractor that seems to have neither moral nor mental defect so we decided to rebuild the basement. Hence, I needed more doorknobs. And the saga continues ...

November 01, 2004
Homosexual Shadow-Puppets For Toddlers

Sometimes I'll be watching TV with the kids, and I'll start wondering about the adults in the programs. For example, did you know Mr. Rogers was a coke-head? Really. Decades ago in the early years of the show. I guess talking to an ugly puppet kinda pushed him over the edge. Then he got clean, and contributed fabulous programming for generations of viewers. So that got me thinking about some of the other adults.

Now, I believe there are many many many talented sober performers in Children's television. I would be heart-broken to hear anything bad about Carol Spinney (Big Bird AND Oscar, among others). But some of the new ones are obviously not all right. Have you seen the clip of the Wiggles singing about making fruit-salad!?! Someone involved in that production was enjoying recreational drugs. I'm not saying it was THE Wiggles. It might have been a producer, or writer, or camera-man. But that is one seriously weird video.

And then, there's Oswald. At first I thought it was kinda like a bad LSD trip (according to how those were described by co-workers, one of which told me all about his trip into the carpet jungle and the weird things that live under our feet. ) I was so mesmerized by the "odd" voices and their equally "odd" buildings/houses that I asked friends to watch it. They thought I was insane until they saw it while we were playing boardgames. I also pointed out the gay shadow puppets on BearInTheBigBlueHouse, which is a show I loved until I noticed that. (I disapprove of sneaky-indoctrination) This is another of those times that my husband rolled his eyes and speculated that maybe my imagination had gotten the better of me. Afterall, what kinda freaky show would have homosexual shadow-puppets for toddlers !?! How fortunate that I happened to TIVO the show, and the captions confirmed what we was seeing. He was shocked. My friends were shocked. Of all the weirdness in the world, I've decided nothing shocks me more than gay shadow-puppets.

Weird And Interesting Personal Side-effects of Motrin

I've noticed a trend in my family to have "sensitive" reactions to many vitamins and medications. For example, usually a dose of Percocet is good for 4-6 hours. A half dose will render me totally pain-free for twelve hours. On the other hand, valium and codeine do absolutely nothing for me. Most of my extended family is the same general way.

I've been in "screaming" back-pain since Thursday. Today I'm better enough to be whining about it. Thats a good indicator that I'm really better. I've also been eating Motrin like candy. 800 mg every 6 hours, supplementing occassionally with Aleve.

I've noticed that the roots of my hairs hurts. This is different from hung-over people announcing their hair hurts. Mostly, they're nuts and my hairs really hurt. I've also noticed that when taking large doses of Motrin, I start having nightmares. REALLY bad ones, and I'm often unable to wake up. Although as I come off the Motrin, I find I can stop the dream and snap awake. My husband kinda rolled his eyes, and suggested it might be all in my head. So, I polled various relatives in a blind poll. Its definitely a family trend. Even those that weren't aware of the trend exhibited the same effects.

Other weird side-effects: coming of antibiotics, I get a little depressed. Nothing suicidal, but still noticable. For about a week. Sam is WAY more sensitive than I am to synthetics. If she takes a synthetic medication, she basically gets put on a suicide watch until the medication clears her system. Fortunately, her mother likes to travel and clean closets. If you have to be sick, getting your closets cleaned and organized kinda compensates.

Maybe I should be writing more cheerful posts, although I find vaguely morbid topics interesting too and non-depressing.

Here's an antecdote for your edifications: I asked Lee to hand me a hushpuppy. He was deliberating, and explained that he needed to pick a big fat one for me ... because I was big and fat. My husband tried to explain to him that he shouldn't tell me I'm big and fat. Lee replied "But its true" My husband pointed out that it might make me feel bad. Lee asssurred him "Its ok, She already knows!" LoL!