The Considerate Neighbor

(Yes, this is the dog-poop fertilizer post promised earlier :)

(For Sheilah, who lives in Oregon now)

Once upon a time, I lived in Oregon. Its one of the most beautiful places on Earth. Especially the Columbia River Gorge, and the drive up around Mt.Hood, and the drive along the coast from Tillamook to Cannon Beach.

The people there are "different", but mostly friendly. Except for the woman that lived next door to me on the left. Someone had definitely licked the stripe off her candycane. Perhaps a bit harsh, but vital to the story, is the point that she demonstrated at every point that she felt she was more sophisticated that everyone else. Afterall, SHE didn't drive a mini-van and eat at restaurents with playlands. How very common!

The house had been under-construction for several months when we bought it. We were the very first homeowners. The lots were ridiculously narrow, but had "greenspace" access across the back, which was rare there. The backyard faded off into wilderness. (One day we were eating dinner on the second-story deck and a group of boyscouts exploring the "wilderness" marched through my newly sprouted gladiolias below us. Guess that they hadn't learned how to identify "flowers" yet. They even had trouble identifying "cranky people who own trampled flowers". We helped them with that deficiency.) Since the lots were so narrow, the houses were VERY close together. The distance between my front door and That Woman's front door was about 60ft. Her walkway turned sharply at her door and aimed at her driveway, which rode the property line between us.

Get a GOOD visual. If you stepped out my door, and she stepped out her door, her walkway almost connected us.

Almost, but not quite. Between my door and her driveway/walkway, my yard was grass. With one very VERY green spot that we didn't understand. It was just odd. Then I saw it with my own eyes.

Early one morning, I stepped out the door at the exact moment she let her little yippy dog out to do his "business". She stayed tucked inside the doorway because she was wearing her robe and smoking and it was drizzling. (Its always drizzling in Oregon). Then she saw me seeing her. Then she saw me seeing the little dog. Doing what I now suspect he did every morning. Marching firmly down the walk, across the driveway, across the mulch-marked property line, and pooping in my yard!

Oh, yes, she tried to stop him after she saw me. She desperately called for him is stage-whispers, frantically making obvious hand-gestures (like I was deaf and blind). Once, the little dog even stopped and looked back at her like she was crazy, before he went straight to our VERY green polka-dot of grass. I thought she would die of embarassment as she tried to slink back into the house clutching her robe! Caught in the act! Obviously having TRAINED her dog to poop just inches over the property line.

It would have been the kind thing to go on to the car and pretend I hadn't seen anything. I wasn't feeling particularly kind. I waved and laughed loudly.


Good for you!!! We are fortunate to be fenced in....but, our next door neighbor hasn't said 2 words to us in the 2 years we have been here, and she has one of those little yippy dogs that I'm sure would be over here pooping if it weren't for the fence!!

Oh, well she's old and knows not how she acts...or at least that is what I tell myself as the kids are walking by saying "Hi" to her and she ignores them! :(

Sheilah | 04/26/2004 - 05:24 AM
Make Waves

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